Sitting on a patient’s table, watching the cardiologist review the same folder of tests he’d seen in my first visit, while more or less ignoring any questions I had, I was struck by the thought, “Doctors Listening” was an oxymoron.
I had only recently switched cardiologists. The last one, after seeing my high calcium score, and blood tests indicating a higher than optimal A1C count, had put me on Ozempic, while ordering that I cut out red meat, eat 3 salads a day, refrain from sweets and red wine, and start eating lots of turkey.
I may not have stopped all red meat, and only managed 2 salads a day. But I did eliminate sweets almost entirely and red wine completely. Plus I began eating lots of chicken and turkey. I picked up the Ozempic prescription, but only injected 2-3 times. I wanted to see if I could do this without the drug. And I did! After a few months my A1C was in range, and I’d lost 35 pounds.
Thinking the doctor would be thrilled to see these results, I was quite surprised that he insisted I stay on Ozempic, plus add a new drug to replace the fish oil I was taking.
Why, I asked? Explaining that I prefer to take as few drugs as possible… I was giving my reasons for this when he cut me off, saying, “No, I want you to stay on Ozempic, and the fish oil is not as good….” When I told him, I didn’t think he was listening to me, it was as if a champagne cork popped, out exploding an unending petty defense including, “I’m a good doctor” and “I do listen”, and “My patients appreciate me”, I’m very experienced” , on and on and on…never addressing my reasons for not wanting to become dependent on these drugs when it didn’t seem necessary. I finally got up and started walking out of his office. He followed me to the front door, repeating what a good doctor he was, the receptionist looking on quizzically, me not saying a word…
Since then, I was fortunate to have a cardiologist recommended to me, who I’ve been with for years now. A good guy. Very competent. Not very chatty, but he does look at me and listens while I’m in his office. Genuine customer service, I’d say.
Meanwhile, in switching gyms not too long ago, I re-aggravated an old knee injury. The pain wouldn’t go away so I sought out a local orthopedic doctor. He took an x-ray and without much of an explanation, suggested surgery. I mentioned, I’d had good results in the past with physical therapy. And he grinned, saying sarcastically, “afterwards you’ll still need surgery”. When I tried steering the conversation towards building up the knee joint, it was as if I was speaking to a wall.
So, even though it was quite a distance I drove out to the orthopedic surgeon who’d operated on the knee 15 years earlier. He agreed physical therapy was a good idea, which ended up strengthening my knee to a point where there was no pain at all. Since then, I manage a regular set of knee exercises in my gym routine, which keeps the knee in good shape.
As it happens, this surgeon was similar in age and tone to the doctor I see for colonoscopies. Both very cordial and fast-moving but with enough “bedside manner” to squeeze in a few moments of actual doctors listening.
Unfortunately, I smoked all through my younger years. And now as I’m older, I’m paying for it with occasional shortness of breath. The pulmonary physician recommended to me suggested Albuterol, after it marginally improved my breathing on his lung capacity test. I had several questions about options, exercise increasing lung capacity, and most importantly, would it lead to dependency… he grunted yes and no a few times, while repeating in a disinterested tone, “Take the Albuterol”. Although I never went back to him, I did get the prescription. And I’ve been renewing it through my primary physician for 5 years now, just to have it in an emergency. But I’ve never had to use it. Not even once.
One of the reasons I like my primary physician, whom I’ve had for years, is that he listens with interest to how I’m doing every time I see him. And because of his interest, I find myself asking him about his practice, his business. And we begin each visit with a brief, enjoyable conversation.
I don’t expect this level of communication from every specialist I see. But if you want my business, regardless of how competent, experienced or busy you are, you’ll have to make some effort to listen.
I’ve learned there’s no need to settle on doctors that don’t make time to communicate.
After all, doctors listening does not have to be an oxymoron.
Rick Grassi
The Little Customer Service Book
A Common Sense Guide to Helping People
Recommended Links:
tps://thelittlecustomerservicebook.com/
https://thelittlecustomerservicebook.com/2023/03/19/customer-service-for-boomers-vs-gen-z/
https://thelittlecustomerservicebook.com/2023/06/17/warmth-in-customer-service/
